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Kate Thompson - a couple psychoanalytic psychotherapist, faculty staff member and clinical lecturer at Tavistock Relationships. 

It takes two to tango, in couples therapy we see the connection between relatonships and dancing.

Strictly Come Dancing is back for another season, and as well as creating intense, physically intimate relationships on screen, if past years are anything to go by, it’s also likely to fire up some new couple relationships amongst the contestants and their dance partners.

The Strictly dancers spend large amounts of time together each week as they train for their next incredibly exciting television and live studio audience appearance.  So it’s not surprising when these intense feelings sometimes end up going beyond just dancing together.

Over the years, a number of Strictly celebs have ended up leaving long term relationships for their dance partner.  And whilst most of us aren’t married to celebrities likely to appear on the next Strictly, it is a reminder to us of the importance of working at our own couple relationships and taking time to put each other in the spotlight.

Research shows that relationships are important for a sense of general wellbeing and good health – for the couple themselves and that of any children they may share.  But being part of a couple is an unending, ever-developing process - so just like competing on Strictly, it takes a lot of ‘work’.

Couples should get to know the vital ingredients needed in their relationship to create the right recipe.  Sexual intimacy, communication, exercise, time with family, guarded couple space, individual ambitions and shared dreams, for both the two individuals that make up the couple and the relationship itself.  

If one of the ingredients is missing for a length of time, a couple might come to recognise the relationship is starting to feel more strained and a rebalancing needs to occur.  If they are familiar with the ingredients the relationship needs, it can be easier to pinpoint what is missing and rectify it – with a night out or a discussion about how they are feeling. And maybe starting a new shared reconnecting activity together – like ballroom dancing!

You can talk to one of our relationship counsellors about issues between you as a couple, individually or around sexual problems here.

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